Joel and Kathy Davisson Your Marriage Restored They completely destroyed my marriage Internet

Kathy Davisson once said that when her husband (Joel) treats her bad, that she is going to treat him badly also. This is quite amazing considering that by her doing so, she is being hypocritical and a neanderthal like her hubby. Has she read 1 Corinthians 13th chapter? Um, no. Or she did and turned her head to it. What an ongoing tragedt it must be in their own marriage that the good times in their marriage depends on behaviour and not the one they claim to uphold: Jesus Christ. For when Christ was treated poorly, unfairly, and even physically abused He never not even once in no way whatsoever responded in like manner. But yet these so-called Christ promoting folk don't dio as they claim. Instead of a marriage gracefully founded in the love of Christ, thirs is founded in "tit for tat" philosophy. If you are having marital difficulties, consult a WELL-KNOWN, HONEST AND WHOLLY ALL-BIBLE TRUTH PRACTICING source of help; the Davissons have ruined many an already badly damaged marriage. They hang you if you question or disagree, and are quite stirred up when asked of their failure rate, choosing then to blame the couple WHO WHOLLY PUT THE ADVICE GIVEN THEM BY THE DAVISSONS into action! WOW!!! The Davissons want your money. End of story.

My wife and I once upon a bad time in our marriage (which still exists by the grace of God) went to the Davissons via friend referral. I will say that I caused my share of the marriage issues BUT am not the only one. This crap of the wife recieving a slap on the hand for murder due to her hubby's bad behaviour is, well, crap! The Davissons actually promote divorce, and even suggests the wife use it to manipulate every situation. God hates divorce and in no wise condones it unless for adultery, yet even then He commands to forgive. Just read the book of Hosea and Matthew 5:32. Of course, with a divorce, God knows EVERYTHING , Joel and Kathy. It has been looked into that with all of Joel's "poking around in other holes...." that Kathy had the axe to his throat. So he either straighten up by giving her what she wants, or get exposed. There is absolutely no way that their marriage is PERFECT. I called Joel one afternoon on my break to get some "husband advice" and Kathy answers. HOW DARE SHE GET AN ATTITUDE ecspecially her not even hearing me out?? These two are proud hypocrites! This approach they have of one solution fixes ANY marriage is total horse-j**z. God saved my marriage and He didn't belittle or threaten me! He CHANGED me, Joel and Kathy. You guys teach BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION! Your "conquest" is not the solution you falsely claim it to be: because it just cannot be that nearly every couple you encounter ends up in divorce or as repeat customers. No it's not "because" THEY failed to comply with your one-minded "fix" to solve it all! It's because they are DIFFERENT and you KNEW this but yet you mistreated it. These people foolishly and ignorantly trusted you. You have NO SKILL in dealing with marriages as 1-on-1, because YOU CANT BECAUSE YOUR CASH COW WOULD STARVE! So you round 'em up and shoot 'em down WITHOUT actually targeting each couples issues and helping them. No marriage will be happy with you because you dont listen to your clients, save only if they AGREE with you- and so the husband says "if I make just one peep, my wife will divorce me". You cut communication. Yes, be honest and responsible but you promote the "hurt" party's side by condoning their behaviour. Do you do this with YOUR KIDS? "Oh go ahead, its ok to call your father a ****head BECAUSE YOU ARE ONLY RESPONDING TO HIS ****HEADEDNESS!" Come on now! Let's reverse the scene for a moment: the wife does what the husband does and vice versa. So is the WIFE still innocent? I mean she just did what the husband does, right? Marriage is not about getting away with anything- THIS GOES FOR BOTH SIDES. Joel and Kathy, you hide behind "being like Jesus", but JESUS NEVER TAUGHT PAYBACK: HE SAID OVERCOME! OVERCOME EVIL WITH GOOD! This in no wise means that the abused and/or cheated upon spouse continue in the marriage should these issues persist, nor should they "deal" with them; did JESUS DIVORCE YOU FOR ALL OF YOUR CRAP? But you guys teach that divorce is OK you cheer it on. I am flabbergasted at how many couples put themselves through your "help"; IT IS A PROVEN TRUTH THAT WHEN SOMEONE IS TOLD TO CHANGE "OR ELSE" (PRETTY MUCH) THAT THE PERSON DOES IT WRONGFULLY AND NOT FROM THE HEART! You guys promote a "fast food" solution to marriage issues, because SINCERE heart-change takes time, NOT THREATS!

What Joel and Kathy have set out to do with their "ministry" is questionable. For starters, the Lord God saved mine and my wife's marriage: it had absolutely NOTHING WHATSOEVER to do with Joel and Kathy. In truth, us getting AWAY from their "help" is one of the steps that helped save our marriage. Secondly, how DARE Joel and Kathy fool people by claiming that THEIR ASSISTANCE and theirs alone is the only hope for any troubled marriage, because in english they are saying that not even GOD can help you! Nowhere in their ministry do they use Scripture correctly or do they even compare their "project" to Scripture. Nobody wants their marriage to be EXACTLY like theirs! Thirdly, yes Scripture DOES say that the husbands are to love and protect their wives as Christ Jesus does His church: BUT the Davissons teach that ANY AND ALL "responses" given by the wife (good or bad) is due in fault on the husband's part, which is ludicrous. This crackpipe notion is essentially teaching that the wife can get away with murder BECAUSE of her husband. THIS NOTION OF "RENDER EVIL FOR EVIL" IS A DEVILISH DECEPTION; CHRIST SAID TO OVERCOME EVIL WITH GOOD! Therefore, all sin committed by the wife is made "excusable" because the big bad husband made her mad? It's clear then that the wife has maturity and responsibilty issues and, like her husband, needs to grow up. The first time I ever spoke to Kathy, she was a hypocrite: she treated me the exact way that she taught NOT to do! I don't care your religion, gender, or what have you: at no time is not acting like Christ FOR ANY REASONS, excusable. Look at Calvary. Want to excuse now? The crap they teach is BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION in that it's "stop this or else" and fails to teach one important truth: WITHOUT THE HOLY SPIRIT YOU CANNOT CHANGE SQUAT! Sure, we have a choice, but we do not have the power to change our hearts. Yes, the husband is the leader and therefore is to seek Christ humbly and sincerely so that he may fulfill his God-appointed responsibilities, but he also is NOT responsible for his wife's mistakes. He may have angered her but NOBODY CAN MAKE YOU DO ANYTHING JOEL AND KATHY! They also don't "focus" on couples separately so that each couple's issues can be addressed. No two marriages are the same. Period. By the way Joel and Kathy: you have a few good things, but GOD saved our marriage...NOT YOU!

I am truly sorry for your impending divorce.  However, the criticism that you have leveled against the paradigm of Joel and kathy is really unfounded.  I realize that whenever we are hurting it's easy to look to someone else to blame and even the notion that you are doing that is offensive so I apologize for that as well.  It's not my intention to inflict anymore hurt on you.  However, there are a number of issues here.  Joel and Kathy are charismatic.  It is possible for many people of differing theological perspectives to argue all of their interpretations of the Bible.  I am a Wesleyan; nevertheless, I find many Reformed and Calvinists to be extremely wise and helpful.  Just because I don't agree with all of their theology doesn't mean that I cannot see the good they have to offer and I feel the same way about people that are Charismatic.  The bottom line is that the basis of the paradigm is based on men loving their wives as Christ loved the church.....period.  The expectation for their wives is that they fulfill their responsibility and they respond with respect.  This only works if both partners employ this.  Whenever a husband continually points the finger at his wife for her fault, it's a pretty good indication that he has not implemented the paradigm of a husband loving his wife like Christ loved the church.  There are 2 observations I have to say.  First, if you don't agree with what they have to say, that's one thing.  You are certainly free to disagree. But I take issue with anyone who has not implemented what they have said.......who looks at it and says it's faulty and you aren't going to do it and then say it doesn't work.  It"s worked for too many people to say it doesn't work.  If you don't implement it....it's not going to work.  So you went to a seminar, you didn't like what they had to say, you didn't apply it, and now you are saying it doesn't work?????  It can't work if you don't do it.  Furthermore, you stated that your wife had mental problems.  If that's true, you can't blame someone else for her reaction.  They can advise couples in general that the traditional form of marriage counseling hasn't worked as is evidenced by a divorce rate of 50%, but if your wife chooses not to go back for counseling, that is her decision.  It sounds to me like you are wanting to blame someone for your failed marriage and you want more than anything else to make your wife highly responsible and that is totally contrary to what Joel and Kathy advise.  No wonder you don't like what they have to say.  Finally, you charge them with the very serious accusation of being a cult.  Are you kidding me?  Do you know what a cult is?  There is nothing about them that is a cult.  They do marriage seminars that's it.  Before you level those kinds of accusations you need to have more than your own failed marriage to use as proof.  I truly am sorry for your loss, but it is not their fault and I believe you are out of line for accusing them of being a cult.  You are free to say you chose not to do it.......your wife wanted to do it and you didn't........and you ended up getting a divorce.  You can say it wasn't helpful to you, but that doesn't make them bad and it certainly doesn't make them a cult.  

Several years ago my wife became aware of this "ministry"( sadly through my sending her an e-mail with a comment made by Joel) and our marriage has gone downhill since.  We read both books, attended an intensive as well.  Since then we spent time on the forums and on the telephone"help" lines.  The only person who can do wrong is the husband!  Anyone who questions that theory is chastised and told that obviously there is a problem and it is you(husband).  We went to counseling in Denver with Integrity ministries and were warned about Joel and Kathy.  Joel claims to be a product of Integrity and claims to base his "ministry" on theirs.  Yes Joel went to the ministry(under misleading terms), then he plagiarized their material.  Initially he had their support then that changed as he went beyond their guidelines and outside their boundaries. Subsequently Joel and Kathy have removed all statements referring to Denver or that ministry.
 After listening to hours of the phone calls and not hearing a single wife being told she needed to change her act, after meeting several of the leaders in this "ministry" it became very obvious that there are really only two motives to this"ministry": 1) create income, either through the sale of his books, DVD's(really poor quality), 5 HOUR Energy products, other aphrodisiacs, the intensives, etc.; 2) appeal to the current climate of "if you are not the person in charge you are being abused".  This is shown by their compulsive and overbearing male bashing.  If your wife is ill it is the males fault, if your wife feels there are issues then it is the guys fault.  They did give lip service to the wives having an occasional issue in their reprinting of the second book.

They make no effort to hold the ladies accountable for any of their actions and as a matter of fact tell the guys that if the ladies treat them poorly it is a result of past actions and they should just suck it up and take it like a man for however long it goes on after all that is obviously how you treated your wife for years and she is just paying you back..

On another issue,  Joel continues listing himself as pastor of Champions church,  This church owns his home(tax break)  and meets at a local restaurant each Sunday evening for their"church" service which includes the church buying the meals for attenders while issuing tax receipts for any giving the attenders give.

Yes this is a cult:  operates under strict guidelines from Joel's book,  no other ministry  is accepted unless they agree with Joel, Do not allow for discourse or disagreement rather they ridicule anyone who challenges them on doctrine or theology.

Stay as far away as possible!!